My Left Leg-A Walk with Lymphedema

                                                  

I have been diagnosed with Lymphedema for about 5 years now, with no real complications. I think for the most part have a pretty good handle on it. But I am starting to see little things, like swelling more frequently, more pain, more frustration and fear. I find myself trying to look ahead (in an effort to be prepared). But what happens is, fear steps in. I realize the outcome of this condition. I am reminded of the scripture that tells me not to worry about the future, however I find that I do in fact worry, which is the opposite of faith right? Yes I know.

There are many ways that people handle stress and I am no exception. For the past month I have neglected to take proper care of my legs; because I lost hope. I felt I was going to gain weight anyway because of lymphedema. So why not eat what I want, do what I want and simply exist. I reached this point with tears in my eyes feeling out of control and defeated. I had given in to the enemy. I found myself right where he wanted me. but not for long.

See, although there are times of weakness, I declare that I am strong. I cannot give up! I don't know what the future holds for me. This is a scary scary disease but I have to hold on. So often I wonder why. I may never know the answer to that question. I am having more and more health challenges...is this inevitable? I don't know. But what I do know, is that it is a struggle, it is an up hill battle and for right now, I'm holding on.